Kitty Verus The Progressive Lady
by Homeydaclown
Summary: Kitty meets Flo the Progressive Lady, with unpredicted results. Comedy & Parody. Language. Rated T.


_**Kitty Vs. The Progressive Bitch**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. I'm just doing this for fun & I only own her twin sister; Roz Katswell. So please, read & enjoy.**_

Kitty Katswell, a sexy TUFF agent, were looking around in a all white room, filled with white, blue, & orange boxes.

Then a stupid looking woman, with dark brown hair, a blue hairband, red lipstick, white shirt, white apron, with the letters; 'Progressive' written in blue, across the breast, white jeans, & white sneakers walks up to Kitty.

"Can I help you, Ms?" she asks.

Kitty turns to her.

"Yes." Kitty started. "I think, I'm lost."

The woman smiles at Kitty.

"You're not lost." the Progressive woman exclaims. "You're in the wonderful world of Progressive car insurance! My name's Flo and how can I help you?"

"I just wanna get out of here!" Kitty shouted at Flo.

Just then, Kitty hears a familiar voice.

"Kitty?" said the voice.

"Roz?" Kitty called.

"Yeah!" Roz called out.

Kitty runs over towards the direction, where Roz's voice was.

She sees a tan cat, with fiery red hair which was in a ponytail, dark blue spy jacket, white shirt, black pants, dark blue boots, and white gloves with red & black trim on top.

She also haves medium to large breasts, cute triangle black nose, sexy hourglass midsection, sexy thighs & legs, and a big sexy booty.

"There you are, Roz." Kitty shouted, as she runs over to her twin.

"Thank you, you're here, sis." Roz said. "I can't find a way out of here."

"Me neither, Roz." Kitty said. "And I tried to ask for help."

"I did too." Roz said. "But this stupid-looking woman, wanted to give me car insurance."

Kitty looks behind Roz.

"Did this woman have dark brown hair?" she asks her twin sister.

"Yeah." Roz replies.

"Did she wear all white?" Kitty asked.

"Yeah." Roz said.

"Did she wear, red lipstick?" Kitty asked again.

"Yeah." Roz replies again.

"Did she have a blue hair band on her head?" Kitty asked.

"Yeah." Roz said.

"Did she have a stupid look on her face & she was happy all of the damn time & goes on about Progressive car insurance?" Kitty asks.

"Yes!" Roz exclaims. "That's her! So, how do you know about her?"

Before Kitty can answer, Flo grabs Roz by the shoulder.

"There you two are." she said in a annoying voice & a creepy smile. "So, do you wanna find an easier way for auto insurance?"

"NO!" shouted the Katswell sisters. "WE WANNA GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!"

"As soon, as we compare your Progressive direct rates, to the other top companies." Flo said with a stupid grin on her stupid face. "Plus, don't cuss in here. You'll scare all of the other customers."

"BUY PROGRESSIVE!" said the zombie-like victims of Flo.

"HELP ME!" shouted a voice.

The belonger of the voice, runs up to Kitty & Roz.

The person was; Dudley Puppy. Kitty's & Roz's partner.

His clothes were all torned.

"HELP ME, KITTY!" he cried. "I've been in here since, last Saturday! All this Flo woman ever does is; talk about Progressive insurance & savings! She makes us dress up like her & all the employees that work here! She gives us only salads & green ice tea for breakfast, lunch, & dinner!"

"Damn!" Roz said. "That's awful, Duds."

Dudley looks at Roz.

"Look at me, Kitty & Rozzie."

Then he lifts up his shirt.

"I'm losing my strong & buffed abs." he cries. "I haven't had meat for almost a week! If I stay here one more day, I'll be a skinny-ass punk!"

"Bad doggie." Flo said. "Looks like, extra salads for you at dinnertime."

Then she turns to the Katswells.

"So, do you wanna see our Progressive board with your names on it?" Flo asks with a extra creepy smile. "And see all of the competitor's prices?"

"NO!" shouted the Katswells.

Flo laughs.

"Well then." she said. "I guess, I'm gonna have to capture you & make you my zombie slaves."

Then all of the Progressive employees surrounds Kitty & Roz.

The Katswell twins laughs.

"Ha! This shit's gonna be easy!" they said.

Then they started beating the hell out of the douchebag employees at the Progressive store supermarket place.

"HA!" Kitty shouted, as she slashes the throats to some of the employees.

"XIANG!" Roz shouted, as she karate kicks three guys' heads off at once.

"CHOP SUEY!" Kitty shouted, as she karate chops five employees heads off.

"HA!" Roz shouted, as she sends some ultra Katswell kicks to six employee's groin, destroying their balls & killing them.

Then all of the Progressive employees was dead.

The Katswell Sisters turned to Flo, who was standing there, with a stupid smile on her face.

"Very good." she laughs. "We also offer secret agent insurance, if you two are interested?"

Kitty & Roz was starting to get pissed.

"Grrrrrrrrrrr!" Kitty starts to growl.

Roz stops her from growling.

"Wait a minute, sis." she said. "Maybe, we should be interested in getting insurance from Flo."

"Roz!" Kitty exclaims. "What the hell's wrong with you! That woman's a bitch! We shouldn't buy shit from her."

Then she sees Roz winking.

Kitty realizes, what Rozzie was planning.

"Okay, Roz." she said in a acting sort of voice, as she winks. "We'll get some insurance from Flo."

Flo smiles widely to this.

"Okay!" she said, follow me to the cash register, please?"

Then they go over to Flo's cash register.

Flo presses some buttons on the cash register.

"Hmmmm! Hmmmm! Hmmmmm! Hmmmmm!" the stupid bitch hums happily. "Savings! Car Insurance! Savings! Saving people money on insurance, makes me very happy!"

Roz looks at Kitty & nods.

"Ready, sis?" she asks.

"Yeah, Roz." Kitty replies.

"On the count of 3." Roz started. "We blast her fuckin' brains out."

Then she takes out her AK-47.

"Ready?" Roz asks.

Kitty takes out her own AK-47.

"Yeah." Kitty replies.

Then they put their AK's against Flo's head & pull on their triggers.

**_BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!_**

Flo falls dead to the floor.

Her brains spills onto the floor.

"That'll show you, you stupid bitch!" Kitty sniffs, as she puts away her AK-47.

Roz goes to Flo's dead body & takes her keys.

"Now, that the bitch's dead. We can free everyone." she said happily.

Then she goes to the door & puts the key into the lock & unlocks the doors.

The door opens.

Kitty turns to the Flo-brain drained zombies.

"You're free!" she shouted.

The zombies looked at the sun for the very first time, since they was captured.

"Sun? Birds? Cars?" the zombies said. "FREEDOM!"

Then they started running out of the building & into the streets.

"YAY! Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!" the victims laughed & cheered as they celebrated.

Dudley craws weakly out of the Progressive place.

"Freedom!" he said weakly.

Then he inhales some delicious aroma.

"Mmmmm! H-Hot Dogs! F-Fried chicken!" he said, as he sniffs. "MUST EAT!"

Then he starts running towards the hot dog truck & the PFC place.

Kitty & Roz sees Dudley do this.

"Well, at least Dudley's happy now." Kitty said.

"Yeah." Roz said. "Time to blow this fuckin' joint off the face of the earth!"

"Yeah." Kitty said, as she & Roz took out some M-80's.

They lit them & threw them into the building.

"DUCK & COVER!" they shouted & took shelter behind a building across the street.

The Progressive building explodes.

Minutes later, there was nothing but dust.

"Ha! We win!" Roz exclaims.

"Yeah. We sure did, Roz." Kitty said. "Let's go home."

Then the Katswell sisters get into their cars & drive home.

Then a female announcer is heard.

"The best place, to find the best deal." she started, before a gun shot was heard.

Kitty & Roz appears.

"Fuck that, Progressive shit." they said. "Go with Allstate."

Just then, that mayhem guy from the Allstate commercials appears on in front of them.

"Hi. I'm mayhem." he said.

_**BANG!**_

Roz shot him dead.

"Fuckin' asshole!" she sniffs.

Then Dennis Haysbert appears.

"It's all Allstate stand." he started. "Are you in good hands?"

Roz & Kitty looks at him with lust.

"Mmmmmm! Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!" they said. "Are you?"

Haysbert starts sweating.

"Oh shit!" he exclaims.

Roz grabs him by the arm.

"How would you like, to spend time with us?" she asks with lust.

"Yeah." Kitty said with lust.

"Um, okay!" Haysbert exclaims.

Then they all go to Roz's place & continues their 'time' together.

Then the Allstate logo & phone number appears.

"Are you in good hands?" Haybert asks again.

"Mmmmm. We sure are!" the Katswell twins said over the Allstate logo.

_**The End**_


End file.
